useless introspection
Feb. 26th, 2002 03:46 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
honeymonsterIt occurs to me that I am barely holding back depression. Most days it is a fierce struggle, too. I sleep to much, perhaps.. but I've always been in love with sleep.
No, it's more about feeling worthless. When I get through a day and nothing much has gotten done (even when I've spent said day in incredible pain), I feel guilty.
One of the most frustrating things is how hard it is to build up a good pity party. Even when people seem to be ignoring me, I can't just sit around and whine that nobody loves me. I just know it isn't true. And yes, I know that the world does not revolve around me. How boring if it did.
Just.. some days, it's hard to find the point.
But, as always, I love you.
Promise.
No, it's more about feeling worthless. When I get through a day and nothing much has gotten done (even when I've spent said day in incredible pain), I feel guilty.
One of the most frustrating things is how hard it is to build up a good pity party. Even when people seem to be ignoring me, I can't just sit around and whine that nobody loves me. I just know it isn't true. And yes, I know that the world does not revolve around me. How boring if it did.
Just.. some days, it's hard to find the point.
But, as always, I love you.
Promise.
