Build your own Santa letter.

From here.

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Jeffrey's Christmas party. It was Donny who spiked the punch with too much Coke. I can't help it if I drank 60 glasses. It was so good--- smelled and tasted just like cinnamon.

I thought it was funny when I put Sammy's shirt on my head and danced the the funky chicken on the sofa while singing `Straight Outta Compton'. I didn't mean to break Jeffrey's pager and don't know why Jeffrey would sue me for vandalism.

I don't remember calling Pete's wife a squishy cow---even though she looked like one with purple eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Cindi's husband's leg, it was only because I ate too much of that pumpkin pie.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my scooter through my neighbor's roof. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a tasty frog and have me arrested for public exposure!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all lusty and vulgar. And I'm really not to blame for any of this cute stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and sprightly yours,
Honey (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 42 bucks!

74 minutes of music for Steve

This reflects his taste more than mine.

1. "Hawaii Five-O" - The Ventures
   
2. "Straight Out Of Compton" - NWA
   
3. "Baby One More Time" - Travis
   
4. "Detachable Penis" - King Missile
   
5. "Fuck Metallica" - Motorhead
   
6. "Like a Virgin" - Marilyn Manson [This is odd.. and disturbingly arousing..]
   
7. "Good Morning, Captain" - Slint
   
8. "Mount Pleasant" - Tuscadero
   
9. "American Pie" - Killdozer
   
10. "Cornflake Girl" - Jawbox
    
11. "Murder was the Case" - Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre
    
12. "Polly (acoustic)" - Nirvana [This one's just disturbing.]
    
13. "Horses" - Patti Smith
    
14. "Richard Hung Himself" - DRI
    
15. "That's Why Mommy Left Us" - Stephen Lynch
    
16. clip from "Sgt. Kabukiman"

No room for Jeff Buckley or Gillian Welch..
I need to figure out how to get it to quit chopping off the end of little sound clips.

brain hurty

We had freezing rain. Rona stayed home. On top of that, all my stuff hurts. Got two books drying right now. Tired because of naps taken next door to a loud TV and Rona shouting every five minutes.

But--we have pie! Picture soon.

<3<3<3<3

Send me your addresses, dammit.

PIE!